Happy (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Dark days: we’ve all had them. How can you not have them when you’re feeling like you are literally dying? I’m not even close to being a medical professional, but even a dunderhead like me knows that when your body isn’t getting the nutrients it needs to function it’s easy to get depressed.

By the fourth month of my pregnancy I needed help climbing out of the massive pit hg had thrown me into. I sought counseling and, eventually, medication. Looking back, I see that those choices helped me and my unborn child. At the time, it was incredibly difficult for me to seek help. In addition to feeling like I was starving to death, I was terribly scared. I had never been this sick before. Would my baby survive? Would I survive? I was already on Zofran and Phenergan, two medications that have unfortunate side effects.

My question to you is this: How are you doing…really? Are you struggling right now? Does the darkness of your thoughts scare you? If the answer to any of these questions is yes, then consider seeking help. When I was expecting, all I could focus on was how terrible I felt. Pregnancy was way different than what I had expected. Where was the bond I was supposed to feel with the life growing within me? Would it develop after the baby was born? What if it didn’t? My counselor helped me see that these thoughts were normal for someone in my position, and I want you to know that what you’re feeling is probably normal, too.

I included this picture of a happy baby to remind you what you’re fighting for. The fight is not just to stay hydrated, push down another pill or keep eating. As the preacher Joyce Meyer says, it’s a Battlefield of the Mind, and you are a soldier. Do what you need to do to equip yourself with the tools needed to win the war. If that means medication and/or counseling, then do it. You’re in a battle. Gear up.

P.S. Feel like sharing? Let others know they’re not alone by posting a comment below.

  1. caspette says:

    The depression was something I struggled with but at the time didn’t know thats what it was. I kept getting the “dont be silly you will be fine” mantra. In the end I went on mat leave at 7 months pregnant because I couldnt hack working anymore. Once my baby was born the depression was gone. Those days while pregnant were not my best days.

    • hgsurvivor says:

      I’m so glad that the depression was gone once the baby came, caspette. Thanks for sharing. I think it’s important to talk about depression during pregnancy, because people often hear what you were told. Sometimes, “don’t be silly, you’re fine” doesn’t cut it– especially when you have hg.

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